My Struggle

Note: This post has been imported from my self hosted site. It was originally published on October 30, 2022.

First, I absolutely do realize that my personal struggle or struggles aren’t going to be anywhere close to what other people are going through. I would hope, though, that my struggle with food (in this case) might help somebody make a turn.

Even if that somebody is the author of this article.

As of last August I’ve been living the keto lifestyle for three years. I’ve dropped in the neighborhood of 150 pounds. My jeans have gone from 54 to 28/30 inches. I routinely wear a size small shirt, from 3XL. Most people would probably say that I’ve done good. Even those who have made the same journey have told me that I’ve done very well.

Most of these three years have actually been pure maintenance of this change of life. Since about late July of this year, I’ve been struggling mentally to keep this going. I had been doing just fine, having come to grips with being okay with my weight of 175 pounds, and being told by those that are important to me that at 6 foot 2 I didn’t need to be any lower. I have spent a couple of days sub 170, and will admit that was a bit much low for my size.

But, something has changed and I can’t put a finger on it. My weight has been hovering in the sub 185 range – something that scares me to no end. To me, that’s way to close to 200. I can’t do that again.

I don’t crave the same crappy food that I used to snack on, but what I do crave are things like macadamia nuts, natural peanut butter, silly Adkins snack bars that all taste the same to me…. At least it’s not cookies and donuts.

Sigh. At the beginning of this journey I was totally and completely in. If it was a food item and went into my body it also went into my tracking app. Then that slowly started receding (kind of like my hairline I guess). Tomorrow is Halloween. Tomorrow I get back on this train, for the fourth time this week.